When considering all the holidays we celebrate each year, I’m aware of the special meaning that Valentine’s Day has for me. Certainly, Valentine’s Day is the holiday I look forward to most. This day of romance intensifies my feeling of good fortune at having Carole’s love in my life.
Although I’ve known Carole since 1975, when we were ten, our relationship began around Valentine’s Day of 2002. Every February since has brought gratitude and a sense of urgency as I contemplate what more I can do to prove worthy of all that she means to me. Writing thousands of love letters, all multiple pages in length, will never suffice to express the infinite ways that Carole inspires me. I’ve written those letters—and I will continue writing of my love to her privately—but Carole deserves so much more than I’ve given. I’m eager to give more.
Each Valentine’s Day that passes brings us closer to my release from prison. Once I’m home and living with Carole, memories from the thousands of days and nights we spent apart will compel me to show her how I appreciate her. Instead of telling her through written words, I’ll show her by touching her, by holding her, by kissing her.
We don’t know how many more Valentine’s Days will separate us but after the holidays that have passed since 2002, and after this Valentine’s of 2010, we know that at worst we have three more until we celebrate together. I’m feeling closer, more eager to show her rather than tell her how I love her.
This proximity of my release date encourages both Carole and me. I have linked my life to her in every way possible. We are connected through my work, through my network of support, and through the career I will build upon release. When release comes, she will see how our marriage and love defines who I am. And rather than waiting for the magic of Valentine’s Day to express how grateful I am for her love, I’ll create ways to show her through every day.
Our love through the struggles of imprisonment has not been kept alive by luck or by accident, and growing our love through the ages will require continuous effort I look forward to devoting every day. Loving Carole is the essence of my life and I look forward to February and Valentine’s Days as reminders of how fortunate I am.
When the doors open this morning, I’ll go to the track for exercise. I intend to run 10 miles. I’m not sure whether I’ll return for strength training as I’m scheduled for a meeting that will take place after my run. I’ll report my pushup tally in tomorrow’s blog entry.
[consecutive running log: 3,776 miles over the past 425 days]
Wednesday, 10 February 2010
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