This morning I woke at 3:15, eager to resume my work on the manuscript. I’m on the final pages of the first draft for chapter two. That doesn’t sound like I’ve done much work, but I have more than 20,000 words of the manuscript written, which is a strong start. I’ll likely suspend the writing later this week, at least for a few months. I want my agent to have a chance to make suggestions.
At 6:00 I went outside to exercise, but the guards interrupted my run with a surprise count. I returned to the housing unit and I didn’t get back to the track until 7:30. I ran a total of nine miles, then returned to the housing unit to resume my work.
I found it difficult to focus today. I missed Carole. We’re approaching our anniversary and I feel so fortunate to have her love. Few long-term prisoners receive the blessing of love, I know. I’m grateful for what I have, but sad that Carole and I must spend so much time apart. I wish that rules permitted us to visit more, or to talk on the phone more. Rules are very rough on prison families like ours.
Ordinarily, writing takes my mind off of the life I’m missing. But I will not see Carole this coming Friday because she has a class to take. Knowing that we’ll miss a visiting day leaves me counting the days that must pass before we’ll see each other again. It’s 12 days from today, and for some reason, that feels interminable.
I need to focus on my work and on my exercise. By tomorrow I will be productive again. I don’t have any close friends here, as I’m not really a part of the prison population. I’m in the prison, but not of the prison. That’s not a reflection of the other prisoners. They are all well-mannered, for the most part. It’s just my self-imposed schedule keeps me in a kind of cocoon. I’m in bed by 5:30 every afternoon. I wake around 3:00 each morning, and my only break from writing is for exercise, which I do alone. My one friend, Justin, went home in May, and unless someone comes to my housing unit, I’ll likely spend a lot of time alone with my work. This focus makes me crave time with Carole, though it causes me to miss her as well.
My running tally is at 1,560 miles over the past 177 days.
Sunday, 7 June 2009
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