Prison Journal: Day 8,122

On November 4, 2009, in Prison Journal, by Michael Santos

This morning’s meeting with the TOAD outreach program brought confrontation. Our group meets every Wednesday morning to practice presentations, skits, and to discuss improvements we can make. The group of prisoners who participate have a role as leaders, I think, as through our presentations to at-risk adolescents, we contribute to the making of a better society.

Because of our role in working to prevent crimes before they occur, I consider it important to show those in our audience strategies to overcome adversity. Some of my fellow TOAD participants fail to think through the substance of their messages. They insinuate, to a degree, that they still condone the gangster type life. Instead, I urge them to discuss options we all have to change and grow through responsibility and accountability.

When I stated my position, some of the younger gang members of the group disagreed. They told me that I didn’t understand anything about gang pressures, and that sometimes it was necessary to fight with the group. I argued vehemently that such a message contradicts what we stand for and the message we’re striving to deliver. During next Wednesday’s meeting, I intend to make my case again.

I am convinced that all human beings have the power within to triumph over adversity and make positive changes. Doing so, however, requires a 100 percent commitment. When I see wavering, or mixed messages, the speaker loses all authenticity. As a leader, it’s my responsibility to point out inconsistencies. It’s also important that I lead by example, and that’s why I make this commitment to transparency, to living as an open book and inviting others to hold me accountable.

Before the TOAD meeting, I ran 10 miles. That run boosted my ongoing tally to 2,911 miles over the past 326 days. Since I had the 8:00 a.m. appointment with TOAD, I didn’t have time to follow my run with pushups. After the meeting, I had individual meetings with two gang-type prisoners, trying to show them options they could pursue that would lead to more fulfilling lives.

Wednesday, 4 November 2009

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